Bonus Episode 53 – Dan v. Kender, part 1
by Dan Repperger

* (0:55) Introducing the trial.

* (2:35) Presentation of the case.

* (4:54) Plaintiff opening argument.

* (6:32) Defense opening argument.

* (7:43) Plaintiff case in proper and defense cross-examination.  (In case you’re curious, Brandenberg v. Ohio was a real case.)

* (21:33) Defense case in proper and plaintiff cross-examination.

* (35:55) Closing arguments.

* (42:00) Jury instructions.

Hosts: Chris, Dan, John, Julia, Pat, Trampas, Wayne

Comments (7)

Timothy StoneFebruary 27th, 2014 at 10:26 am

Wonderful mock trial of Kender.

Dan wins in this one court of public opinion.

In Summary: Kender uniquely invite party division. There is no more argument.

Lasse Rosenkilde OlsenFebruary 27th, 2014 at 3:42 pm

Totally awesome and hilarious!

Obviously I want to give my own verdict to each count :P


First count: I find that based on the evidence given that Kender does in fact uniquely invite party division from an in character perspective.

My verdict: The Kender can only be allowed in a game upon which all players are aware of the consequences of the Kender behavior and accept its inclusion.

Second count: I find that based on the evidence given that the Kender does in fact invite an annoying and problematic play style from an out of character perspective.

My verdict: The Kender must undergo a “house rule” conversion that specifically rewrites the problematic parts of their play style guide as to address the sections that invite annoying and problematic play styles.

Third count: I find that based on the evidence given that the Kender is in fact not redundant with the Halfling and are in fact distinct enough as a subspecies to validate their existence, this viewed from a gamer standpoint.

My verdict: As the Kender is sufficiently unique it cannot be replaced by another halfling like race or subrace with the consequence that in a setting requiring Kenders, they must take their own role or not appear at all.


You people really should do more of these shows/trials, this is totally fun!

DragonhelmFebruary 27th, 2014 at 9:04 pm

Maybe psionics?

SandPunkFebruary 28th, 2014 at 10:00 am

Wooh getting pretty racist in this court.

DanFebruary 28th, 2014 at 4:10 pm

1. I <3 Tim and Lasse. Their opinions on this issue are objectively correct.

2. I agree that I failed to make the case on Kender being superfluous to the setting. I should have prepared better for that one. However, I have to admit I wasn't ready for Trampas to take an affirmative defense. Even what I had on tap had to be abandoned because it wasn't going to jump that hurdle. Well played, sir!

3. Going into this show, I had no idea what kind of response it would get, since we've never done anything even remotely like it before. My primary concern was that people would misconstrue the interactions between me and Trampas as genuine nerd-rage or vitriol. Fortunately, even if most people don't know the rapport between us, the dry absurdism of the whole thing seems to have shown through quite well. The response has been overwhelmingly positive, and I absolutely want to do it again. We just need to find the right subject.

4. Sandpunk, the entire trial was indeed all about race. In part 2, that actually gets brought up during jury deliberations in a rather comedic way.

DragonhelmFebruary 28th, 2014 at 9:39 pm

I wanted to say a huge thank you to Fear the Boot for having me on as a guest. My helm is off to Dan, who is a master in the topic of debate. :)

I did not expect Dan to reference my fan articles on the Nexus!

When I came into the debate, I wasn’t as prepared as I wanted to be. It was a short turnaround, I got out of work late, and I was nervous as can be! Dan is also a skilled editor! ;) Also props to John for filling the judge role so well.

In hindsight, I can see a few areas I could have done better in. Oh well.

Dan, your 3rd point above is exactly why I went for the motion for a mistrial. I figured that would help to set the tone a bit better. Maybe next time we can shoot for the funny a bit more. “Trampas, you ignorant slut!”

I can see a few ways of expanding on this idea. Psionics came to mind. However, I think the better choice is tinker gnomes. Should they be a playable race? Should they be NPCs? Should they exist at all?

Anyway, I hope everyone had fun!


DragonhelmFebruary 28th, 2014 at 9:40 pm

Also…what do you guys think about an all-kender game at Fear the Con?

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