A grown-ass, in a position of power, fully mentally functioning (from a physiology standpoint anyway) teacher referring to an autistic child in a special needs classroom as a "little bastard" IS NOT EQUIVALENT TO a gym teacher trying to push me to better myself by telling my fat ass to dig a little deeper when we sprint.

Hell, it's not even the equivalent of same gym teacher calling me a fat ass just because he doesn't like me. I can speak out. I can mouth off. I can fight back (efficiently, and not in a random slappy, chair throwy, autistic 10yo way). I can intentionally get myself suspended or even expelled. I can let others know what I'm going through. I can (even though sometimes I'm not good at it) calmly remind myself that this guy being a dickhead to me doesn't make me a failure at life. I can pretend to be sick.

Hell, if nothing else, I can at least be aware enough of my surroundings to connect the dots and have some freaking clue as to why the teacher is speaking to me this way, with this body language and with this tone in his/her voice.

Depending on age and where one falls on the Autism spectrum, many or all of these are things this child could not do.

Not the same at all.

Not. The. F*cking. Same.

Quoting the whole thing because it needs to be.

And by excepting it you approve it.

TL/DW I got bored after the crying about the teachers discussing their hangovers.

Since I didn't subject myself to the whole thing, I can't comment on what really happened to his kid. If you have a legitimate gripe, throwing in every little thing that you find even remotely questionable makes you sound like a whiner and makes people less likely to listen to you.

1. Fix'd.

2. Do you really see these issues as a simple binary like that? No space or spectrum for resignation; feeling helpless or unable to change such a massive phenomenon in any meaningful way; feeling unable to vent or even get a good hate on because you feel that deep down your outrage will not make any meaningful change - or because of the physical/emotional distance between yourself and the specific example cited; being able to feel those things but choosing not to hold onto it for the reasons cited above?

Not criticizing. Not snarking. Just legitimately curious and couldn't find a better way to phrase the question.

This situation, right here? This is why we have lawyers. The father should not only be suing the school until EVERY person involved in this mess is removed from ever having anything to do with his child again, but whoever wrote those notes should be explicitly and personally sued for libel. If every one of those fuckwads ends up unemployable and homeless, I don't give a shit.

Teaching mentally disabled kids is tough. I get it. I couldn't do it. But you know what? I'm not a piece of shit who collects salary for a job I'm not doing, either.



I have only one thing to say to this: Apocalypse averted.

On a more serious note, don't you think that getting to the point and giving the examples of bullying would be more effective? It's a 17 minute YouTube video. If a teacher and an aide talk about their husbands in the presence of my child, my give-a-fuckometer stays pegged at zero. The Alcohol use (the night before) and the sterilization? Not really a big deal. I just think that starting out with that turns off people who might ordinarily agree with you. If anything, I can assure you it lost at least a couple viewers.

I agree with Botty. I also gave up on it after the heaving discussion. I got the general gist of it but I never got to the actual serious bullying bits (I'm assuming there were some later on).

This doesn't mean I don't care, or that I'm not appalled by the actions of the staff. I'm just very old and might not live long enough to get to the end of the video.

Ah, I get you now. I do think you have a point that focusing on the 'big-ticket' items is probably a better way to go. I suspect this guy is just too frazzled to make that point. (Which is why you contact a lawyer--they get paid for precisely those sorts of skills.)

However, in order to continue to hold off Armageddon, I'll say that a teacher who talks about being hung over in front of their students is due to get hauled down to the office for a long chat, at a minimum, and probably a mark on their record, for that particular indiscretion alone. Kids are impressionable, and they're specifically taught to respect and look up to their teachers. Furthermore, they're professionals, in the literal meaning of the word, which means they should be held to a standard of conduct. The kids are, in essence, the school's clients. Even if you're hung over, you don't let on to a client, because it damages their confidence in you.

Here's the other thing. You have a reasonable expectation that somebody is going to be on your side. The asshole gym teacher is going to be condemned as an asshole gym teacher by your peers, and to some extent society as a whole has your back. That doesn't exist in this case. In this case, even something this blatantly egregious is going to be divisive. There's an inevitable large contingent of people who will play the "oh, it's just so hard putting up with autistic people, the teacher may have yelled a bit but it's unfair to do anything about it" card. Hell, they'll play cards like that in situations that are far worse.

Somebody having your back is a pretty big thing. Knowing that, if you do something, you will have allies is a big thing. Not having that and putting up with this shit renders any conflation of the situations disingenuous in the extreme.