The Ankh of Life
When equipped it tells the holder if he is alive or dead

Yeah, I don't think this one could be deemed useless. I think it would make for great roleplay. I'm going to steal it. Thanks Smileyman.

This item would spoil many a Deadlands plot.

the Undead Whistle
Made of human bone and gives a haunting tone.
When used, it attracts undead to you like moths to a flame

The Immovable Belt - When worn over a set of britches and through its belt loops (no matter how loosely), The Immovable Belt will keep said britches from falling or being pulled down. In addition, the buckle is of such ingenious design that it will automatically set itself in a random configuration and must be undone (with a success for Int check at DC 15). Unfortunately the wearer is not immune to these effects.

Miniature Urine Scented Tarp - This 18"X18" tarp smells of urine and, when placed on the ground will attract local young animals who are intent on the item. The scent is so strong that the DC of any skill roll to influence others will be 5 higher than it would otherwise be for 24 hours after carrying it.

The Towel Cape - This cape is expertly crafted by tying two corners of a common towel together. When worn, the wearer will be attacked by illusory assailants visible only to him/her - though they are easily within his ability to dispatch. Gain experience as normal. The benefits of this experience is only available while wearing The Towel Cape.

Steel Trap of Mental Acuity - This bear trap like device must be worn as a necklace with the wearers head through the center to function. Any quick movement causes the trap to bounce and click. When worn, it provides the user with +5 Intelligence. Typically, wearers immediately realize that the Trap is quite dangerous and remove it.

The Brown Trousers: A set of ordinary looking pants, as would be standard in any set of traveling garments. It has an enchantment wherein if the wearer is placed under any danger (be it traps, combat, natural disasters, or being short on the bar tab) they cast Void Bowel on the wearer.

EverWhite Underwear
I piece to complement The Brown Trousers. Just as the name implies, these trunks never stain. Elimnates the need for mom to worry about clean underwear should the wearer have to go to the hospital.

Sun Torch
A 2 foot long brass torch with a crystal fixed on top.
When the arcane word for light is spoken, the crystal will glow ten fold brighter than a normal torch.
However, the crystal gets it power from the sun, and will stop working when there isn't any sunlight.
25,000gp and no refunds.

Relevant song (from the excellent movie Songcatchers)

Hell, IIRC, this actually was one of the available Schticks in Tales from the Floating Vagabond--the Rogers & Hammerstein effect. Made it nigh-impossible to sneak up on someone, but at the same time, anytime someone was about to sneak up on YOU, you got suspenseful music that warned you of the imminent approach, spoiling the ambush completely.

God, that game had some cool ideas. System was a D+ at best, but the basic concept was great. (Another cool one was the Flynn Effect. Not only does it allow you to swing on vines, ropes or chandeliers without a roll, it also provides such items whenever you feel the need for one.)