OK, so. Once a week, I have a boardgaming group. It's an official pay-to-play event at my FLGS, I'm not involved in organising it, but a whole bunch of my friends play there.

Trouble is, we've acquired a That Guy. None of the core group really like him; he's got very little in the way of social graces, he refuses to learn rules (even of games he plays often) and he cheats. In deckbuilding games, nobody but him ever sees his cards; he'll announce what he has, but he refuses to actually show. He seems to be suspiciously lucky with that; never seems to get one of those hands where you can't really do anything useful, unlike everyone else. He's actually been called on cheating once (overlooking a large pile of negative-score cards and announcing that he'd won), but didn't acknowledge that he was being called; he played it off as though it was just absentmindedness.

The people I socialise with outside of this event make up a good 80% of the attendees, and we've all said that something about him isn't quite right, and we really don't like the cheating. The trouble is, he doesn't seem to get hints, and we're all way too polite to just tell him to kindly fuck off because he's making it less fun for everyone else.

Anyone got any suggestions?

How cool are the owners of your FLGS? The guys at the Dice Dojo here in Chicago have taken up some of the more unpleasant social duties. Maybe they could help out?

The main owner is a decent guy with some lines of geekery that intersect mine (we could talk cars for hours...) but the trouble is, That Guy's money is as green as mine.

I think I'm going to try to make That Guy a bigger issue. Between the cheating and the creepy factor, he's putting a downer on what's supposed to be happy fun time...

I'm with pkalata: see if the FLGS will help you out with that.

If that doesn't work one of you needs to have a one-on-one chat with the guy and explain very nicely what's obnoxious.

If that doesn't work, you're kind of at two choices, both of which suck: you can either deal with the guy or you can all stop doing it.

There's always the passive aggressive option of moving the meet up somewhere else and just not telling That Guy. This is an unattractive option because it's both passive aggressive and hurtful to the FLGS. But, you know, some people do that.

Yes, but 80% of the group's money (when combined) is MUCH greener than that guy's money.

Seriously.

Tell your FLGS guy that if he doesn't help you get rid of this guy, he's going to lose everybody else.

Go from dropping hints to direct confrontation....but not direct public confrontation. Maybe someone can just take him aside, either before or after a session, and try to address the issues in a constructive manner.

Obviously, easier said than done. But, maybe he changes, without having to elevate it further.

If that idea is a non-starter, then talk to the FLGS staff for a solution. If it's pay-to-play, then he technically has a right to be there, but he also needs to play by whatever rules are set up. And it's up to whomever is getting "paid" to ensure that those rules are applied fairly to everyone.

So, the FLGS should basically announce that you've got to know the rules of the game, and show your cards. If he refuses to do that, then he's basically flouting the FLGS "house rules" and that could be grounds to kick him out.

If that fails, then a further option is just take your gaming group offsite, even temporarily.

You need to get a "that guy" like The Werefrog who also lacks social graces who is willing to call that guy on it every time. That's the problem with really nice people like you; it's hard for you to stand up to such situations in which a jerk doesn't really what a jerk he is.

However, the first step should be, in your manner, to discuss the issue with that guy. If he changes, great. Alternatively, go to step two.

Step two is discussing the issue with the owner of the store. Let him know that you don't want to leave, but for your money, and that of your friends, this one player is making it unenjoyable for the money spent. If this causes the owner to speak to that guy and that guy changes, great. Alternatively, if that guy is asked to not return, acceptable.


However, if neither of those occur, then perhaps a few weeks without going to the game will show the owner you are serious about the issue, and he will see the difference in money provided by that guy versus you and your friends is substantial.


Granted, the main goal is for that guy to show up and behave, but lacking that, simply not showing up and misbehaving will be accepted.

Wait, and you let him get away with that? "No show" should equal "Autolose", end of story.